


Konoha’s Krazy Kastle

by ladyxdaydream



Category: Naruto
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Family Feels, Feel-good, Fluff, Humor, Kinda crack-y, M/M, Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 19:40:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19875001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyxdaydream/pseuds/ladyxdaydream
Summary: It was Naruto’s seventh birthday, and Iruka had rented something special.Little did he know, someone else would be enjoying it more than his son.





	Konoha’s Krazy Kastle

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gloomier](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloomier/gifts).



> Fair warning, this fic is entirely self-indulgent. I wrote it in almost one-go, when I needed something warm and funny to distract me from some heavy things going on around me. 
> 
> For tea, whose new friendship has brought me more joy than I can explain. Thank you for listening to (and fueling) all my crack ;D

Iruka had just finished slicing the watermelon and putting it in the fridge, when he circled around the island to observe Kakashi’s work: _Happy Birthday Naruto_ , shakily scrawled across 19 cupcakes, the 20th being a dopey, smiley face. It was written in orange edible gel, on top of white frosting.

“That looks terrible,” Iruka laughed. “I love it.”

“Hey, it’s harder to write with this tube than you think,” Kakashi said, defensively, as the doorbell rang.

“Don’t forget the sprinkles,” Iruka said, rubbing his shoulder, planting a kiss there, before whisking off to answer the door.

“Good morning,” Iruka greeted the man, his eyes flicking to the large truck in the driveway.

“Mr. Umino-Hatake?”

“That’s me.”

“We’ve got your rental. Where would you like us to set it up?”

“In the backyard. Let me bring in the dogs and I’ll meet you there.”

Iruka closed the front door, padded his way back through the kitchen, and slid open the glass door to the yard.

“Pakkun! Bisque! Shiba! Inside! _Treat_.”

The three dogs came stampeding, collars jingling madly, brushing past Iruka to sit on the wood floor of the kitchen—panting, tongues lolling, tails wagging—eagerly awaiting their treat. Iruka tossed them each a milkbone, before pulling the screen door shut behind him.

He took a sharp left, past their small garden, before unlocking the wooden gate of the fence, letting two men pass with a large box wheeled between them.

“As far back in the yard as you can, would be great,” Iruka said.

“No problem. It’ll take about 25 minutes to inflate. If you could just sign this paperwork here,” the man said, holding out a clipboard.

Iruka took it and scanned his eyes over the contract. _Konoha’s Krazy Kastle_ was not held responsible for any injuries obtained, and any damage inflicted upon the rental, he’d be charged for. He signed it, with a harsh dot over the i in _Umino_ , and handed it back.

“Great. We’ll just finish up here, and be on our way. We’ll be back around noon tomorrow, to pick it up.”

“Thanks,” Iruka said, before heading back inside.

* * *

“Daddy! Daddy!” Naruto yelled, pulling on the bottom of Iruka’s shirt. “I jumped off the diving board today! In a cannonball! The splash was so BIG! Can you come see me next time? Can you? can you? can you? And Dad, too!”

“Of course,” Iruka laughed, smoothing back his hair. “I’m sorry we missed your lessons today. Hop in the shower,”—Iruka stuck his nose into his son’s blonde hair—“you smell like chlorine. Your friends will be here soon.” Naruto whizzed out of sight. “Thanks, Hana,” Iruka said, to the woman still standing in the doorway.

“Anytime. I’ll bring Kiba back in a bit.”

“See you then.”

Iruka walked back in the kitchen to find Kakashi taking a picture of Shiba in a cardboard party hat, trying to stifle his giggling.

“Babe, look,” Kakashi said, holding out his phone.

“I can see. The real one’s right in front me.”

“No, _look_ ,” Kakashi said, coming to stand beside him, phone in hand. “Look at his face in this one!” Kakashi threw his head back in a deep laugh. Shiba looked thoroughly unimpressed. In fact, he still did, trying to paw the hat off his head.

“Hilarious,” Iruka deadpanned, reaching down to take off the hat, only to place it on top of Kakashi’s head instead, giving the elastic chin band a snap. “Help me set up the tables outside.”

* * *

After a quick shower, Iruka laid sprawled out on the bed in his briefs, his hair still damp against his neck.

He opened up Instagram to find a new story posted from his husband. He clicked on it, revealing the unimpressed picture of Shiba, with “party pooper” written across the bottom, and a gif of a steaming pile of shit behind him.

Iruka snorted out a laugh.

“Idiot,” he muttered, with so much love in his voice, it was nowhere near an insult.

After several more minutes of browsing (which involved Anko and her new motorcycle, Izumo & Kotetsu in a cheesy couples mirror pic, and Genma drinking beer with Raidou in a plastic kiddy pool on his deck), Iruka got up to finish getting ready.

He put on a loose, light gray cotton t-shirt, which had buttons down to his pecs, and a pair of burnt orange pants, rolled up at the ankle. He pulled his hair halfway back in a small bun, the rest left loose, brushing the tops of his collarbones.

* * *

Kakashi was sitting in a plastic chair, thrumming his fingers against the folding table he’d just erected, decorated with bright birthday banners. He eyed the bouncy castle with interest. It was just _begging_ for him to go inside. No one was here yet, anyway, so why not?

He climbed inside on his hands and knees, feeling slightly ridiculous (but not enough to stop him), before standing up. He gave an experimental bounce, the castle dipping beneath his feet, before popping him back up. Glee shot through him.

He smiled to himself, before continuing to jump up in the air, building height every time, before he flipped over and landed on his ass, bouncing back up.

Several euphoric minutes later, there was a scurry of tiny feet on the stone patio.

“Sakura! Look at this! Com’mere!” Ino squealed, crawling up the inflatable stairs, to clutch onto the mesh curtain. “We can pretend”—she froze, midsentence.

Kakashi was in the middle of an airborne, kung-fu kick, when Ino caught him. Her eyes bugged out of her head, before scrambling away without a word.

* * *

“Um, daddy?” Naruto asked, tugging on the side of Iruka’s pants, who was currently pouring potato chips into large, colorful bowls. “We want to play in the castle but… Dad is in there. Can you get him out? I don’t wanna.. He looks like he’s having fun…”

“Dad is… _what?”_ Iruka asked, his eyes flicking to the castle through the window. It was bouncing enthusiastically. He’d been wondering where Kakashi had gotten off to, but that was the last place he was expecting. _Honestly._

He walked outside, with several bowls of snacks in tow, and scattered them among the tables.

When Iruka reached the castle, he poked his head inside to find Kakashi bouncing around with Lee.

“Hi, Mr. Umino! Mr. Hatake is showing me some moves!”

“I’m sure they’re impressive,” Iruka said, smiling politely at Lee, before his mouth straightened into a line. “Kashi, may I talk to you, please?”

“Can it wait till later? I want to show Lee my backflip,”

“So cool!!!” Lee wailed, dropping to his knees dramatically.

Kakashi was grinning like mad, and Iruka had to try really hard to keep it together.

“Now, Kakashi.”

Kakashi sulked. “I’ll be right back,” he said, giving Lee a high-five on his way out.

“No, you won’t.” Iruka said, as Kakashi emerged. Kakashi’s brow was slick with sweat, and his breath short and shallow. “I rented that for Naruto and his friends, not you. They won’t go in, with you in there. You’re weirding them out.” Iruka’s lips quivered, as he fought off a smile.

“What do you mean?” Kakashi said, looking confused. “Lee’s in there.”

“Lee’s weird.”

“Hey, rude.”

“You’re the weirdest person I know, and I married you. It’s hardly an insult.”

“But…”

“Come on. I need you to fire up the grill, anyway.”

Kakashi pouted, but slid into his sandals regardless.

* * *

Iruka had just finished husking the corn, piling it all on a platter, and heading towards the grill, when Kakashi’s phone went off on the counter top. He grabbed it, with the intention of taking it to his husband, but it stopped making noise after the first ding. Iruka glanced at it to see a notification on the screen.

_hotdogdad has a 4 reblogs and 17 new likes._

Iruka nearly dropped the platter to the floor, before placing Kakashi’s phone back on the counter, and walking outside.

* * *

“ _Heeey_ , hotdog dad,” came Iruka’s voice, low and sultry. It would have stroked Kakashi in just the right way, if the implication didn’t terrify him.

Kakashi froze for a moment— _there’s no way. Nope. Can’t be. Coincidence._ —before going back to turning the remaining hotdogs over on the grill, trying to appear inconspicuous.

“ _Ha_ , that’s funny, good one,” Kakashi said nervously, gesturing towards the contents of the grill.

Iruka gave him a funny look, before setting the platter of corn down.

“Can you put those on? I’m going to round up the kids to eat.”

“Yep. Sure.” Kakashi said, avoiding his husband’s eyes, feeling incredibly hot all of a sudden. He pulled on the neck of his t-shirt, stepping back from the grill, as if _that_ was the reason he had started to sweat.

* * *

“I didn’t know you were such a fan of hotdogs,” Iruka said, as Kakashi finished eating his, a glop of mustard falling onto his shirt.

“What? I’m not,” he said, smearing the condiment into his shirt, instead of dabbing at it, like Iruka had told him to do a million times. “I mean I _like_ them…”

Okay, he couldn’t do this anymore. He was about to burst.

“Kakashi. I saw a notification on your phone. It just popped up when I was in the kitchen…hotdog dad, _really?_ That’s your blog name?” Iruka couldn’t stifle his laughter anymore, as his husband’s face colored considerably. “Is that some weird gay innuendo?”

“What?” Kakashi asked, before it looked like it clicked. “Oh, my _god_. Not hotdog dad. Hot. Dog. Dad. Like I’m a dad, to dogs.”

“You had to preface it with hot?” Iruka was literally bursting at the seams.

“You’re also a dad to our seven year old son, you know. I see where your priorities lie,” Iruka teased.

“It’s really old. Way before we adopted Naruto. You gave me that name, by the way. So quit acting so damn smug.”

“Pardon me?” Iruka looked at him, imploringly.

“You don’t remember? Our third date. You were really drunk, and came back to my apartment. You met my dogs, and commented on how my place was basically lost to them, calling me a ‘dog dad’. And then you amended your statement and said ‘a _hot_ dog dad.’”

“No fucking way did I say that,” Iruka denied. “I would never.”

“You absolutely did. It was beautifully and artfully slurred, might I add. It won my heart. That, and the mind-blowing, earth-shattering sex we had shortly afterwards.”

Iruka blushed, darting his eyes around to make sure none of the kids were in earshot.

“I remember the sex…”

“Who wouldn’t?” Kakashi interjected, leering.

“…but not that. It sounds like a handle for a dating app, Kakashi.”

“It’s not,” Kakashi laughed. “I don’t even use it that much anymore. I occasionally check it for the dog memes and Icha Icha fandom stuff. Yesterday was the first time I logged in, in like, two months.”

“Mhm, sure,” Iruka said, as he watched Sasuke pluck a cherry tomato from the garden and pop it into his mouth. When he realized he’d been caught, he blushed and quickly shuffled away.

Iruka stood up and stretched, before pulling Kakashi to his feet.

“Alright, well, let’s go, _hotdogdad,_ we’ve got 20 cupcakes to light.”

Kakashi groaned, smacking Iruka’s butt in retribution.

“You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

Iruka smiled at him over his shoulder, “Never.”

* * *

Several hours later, after singing happy birthday, opening gifts, playing pin-the-tail-on-the-fox, and situating the boys who were spending the night with a movie, Iruka was walking around the patio with a black garbage bag, picking up discarded juice boxes and wrapping paper.

Kakashi knew he shouldn’t do it. Not if he didn’t want to be murdered in his sleep tonight, but…

It was too fucking good to pass up.

“Ru,” he called.

“Hm?” Iruka hummed, turning around, only to be plowed into. “ _What are you doing!”_ Iruka hissed, as Kakashi bent him in half over his shoulder.

He carried Iruka up the steps and threw him inside the bouncy castle.

Iruka scrambled to get out, but Kakashi was quick on his feet, bouncing right next to Iruka, causing his body to flounder and bounce. Kakashi kept on doing it, moving Iruka a few inches away from the exit at a time, denying him any chance to get his bearings.

“ _Kakashi!_ ” Iruka said, “St”—his breath got knocked out of him by another bounce—“op it!”

“Nope,” Kakashi said, trying not to double over with laughter, bouncing Iruka around like a ragdoll.

After a string of curses, Iruka finally got enough ground to pull Kakashi’s feet out from beneath him, bringing him down into the cushy ground. Iruka took the moment of surprise to try and get away, but Kakashi grabbed onto his belt on the back of his pants, wrenching him back down.

That’s _it._

“Fine, you wanna go, huh?” Iruka challenged him.

“Bring it, baby,” Kakashi grinned.

“Let me get to my feet first. It’s only fair.”

They each stood up, facing each other, chests heaving, fists lifted in front of their faces, ready to fight.

“This is so stupid,” Iruka said, perturbed.

“ _So_ stupid,” Kakashi smirked, clearly delighted.

Iruka was the first one to make a move, throwing a punch at Kakashi, who easily blocked it, but was unprepared for Iruka to hook a leg around the back of his knee, bringing them both tumbling to the ground. They wrestled for several minutes before Kakashi managed to pin Iruka beneath him, narrowing his eyes on Iruka’s mouth.

“Do _not_ get turned on right now,” Iruka scolded him.

“Too late,” Kakashi said, running his tongue across his bottom lip, sinking his teeth into it, leaning down for the kiss. Iruka managed to plant a foot on Kakashi’s abdomen, and shove him away, before he got the chance.

Iruka quickly pounced to his feet, but Kakashi was quicker, pushing him into one of the thick walls, pinning one wrist behind his back, and the other beside his head. Kakashi nipped at Iruka’s jaw, before smothering his neck in wet kisses, pressing his tongue into his skin.

“I’m serious, Kakashi. No sex in the castle.”

Kakashi pulled back slightly to give Iruka an amused, excited look.

“Don’t even try and roleplay this into one of your dumb icha icha plots.”

“ _How…”_ Kakashi laughed, in disbelief.

“Because I know you.”

Kakashi brought Iruka’s wrist down to join the other one at his back, before dropping to his knees and rubbing his face in his groin, mouthing at his cock.

“No sex, huh? Says the man who’s already hard.”

Iruka blushed before he hooked a leg around Kakashi’s neck, smashing his face deeper into his crotch. Kakashi let out a wanting gasp, immediately releasing his grip from Iruka’s wrists, to his hips, before Iruka moved his leg, pressed his heel into Kakashi’s shoulder and sent him flying backwards.

“Sucker!” Iruka laughed, moving to sprint away, but Kakashi’s hand darted out to wrap around his ankle, bringing him face first into the soft plastic.

“Ow, _fuck_. My nose,” Iruka groaned.

“I’m so sorry,” Kakashi laughed, climbing up the back of his body. “But that’s no way to treat your knight in shining armor, ma’dam.”

“Fuck you,” Iruka laughed.

“I was hoping it’d be the other way around,” Kakashi said, grinding into his ass. “Just let me unsheathe my sword…” Kakashi tugged at the shell of Iruka’s ear with his teeth.

“I hate you,” Iruka laughed, as he turned from his stomach, onto his back.

“But I love you,” Kakashi replied, dramatically, undoing the remaining buttons on Iruka’s shirt.

“Was that the equivalent to ripping open my bodice?” Iruka teased him.

Kakashi snapped his head up from kissing his chest, his eyes on fire.

“I can’t _believe_ you just got off on that,” Iruka reeled, covering Kakashi’s eyes with his hand.

“You in lace would be a fucking _wet_ dream, Iruka,” Kakashi said, shaking his head free of Iruka’s hand. “I would lose my shit.”

“You’re serious?” Iruka blushed, his lips parting, as Kakashi ran his hand up Iruka’s thigh, and across his hip, cupping him with a rough squeeze.

“ _Fuck_ yes.”

“Hm,” Iruka smirked, rolling his hips up into his husband’s. “Well, maybe we should get some.”

Kakashi closed his eyes, pleasure coloring his cheeks, looking as if he’d just orgasmed in his pants. He ran a hand beneath Iruka’s shirt, to palm and pinch at his nipple.

“Don’t tease me, Iruka. It’s cruel.”

Iruka wrapped his arms around Kakashi’s back, raking his fingers down his spine.

“I’m not,” Iruka whispered into his ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth, as his hands found Kakashi’s ass.

Kakashi’s breath hitched, and Iruka felt a tremor shoot through his husband’s body. He pulled Kakashi’s head back by his hair, and connected their mouths in a kiss.

Kakashi fumbled with Iruka’s belt, unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, attempting to shove his hand between the fabric, but pulled back in frustration.

“Why are they so damn _tight?”_ Kakashi cursed.

“You don’t complain when I’m walking around in them.”

“Because you’ve got the ass of an Olympian god. And right now my dick wants to pray to it.”

“ _What!_ –have we moved on to a Greek mythology kink?”

“I could do that. You’d make a hot as hell Aphrodite.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“ _Your_ idiot,” Kakashi smirked before kissing him.

Despite his better judgment, Iruka relaxed into the kiss, as they made out with the vigor of a couple of high school kids, dry humping included.

Something felt suddenly strange.

“Kakashi…” Iruka said, breaking the kiss.

“If you say no sex again, you’re the biggest fucking tease I sw—,”

“ _Tch_. Shut up. Does it feel like we’re… sinking?”

“Huh?” Kakashi asked, as he rose up on his elbows.

Iruka’s body was definitely sinking into the floor.

“Shit!” Kakashi laughed. “What happened? Did we pierce it or something?”

Somewhere in the distance, they heard loud giggling followed by:

“Sasuke, Kiba, run!!!!”

“ _NARUTOOO!”_ Iruka bellowed, as the castle began to collapse around them.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m dying to know what you think of this ridiculous fic! 
> 
> *:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*
> 
> P.S. I've truly been humbled by all your comments/kudos on my recent fics. They keep coming in, and I keep blushing in gratitude. Thank you so much for your continued support!
> 
> Come find me on [tumblr](https://ladyxxdaydream.tumblr.com/)!!
> 
> PPS. Please check out this bouncy castle [drawing](https://ladyxxdaydream.tumblr.com/post/186408439605/art-by-tea-blitz-0-which-accompanys-a) by tea ;D


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